Office Space
by PimpinSushi
Summary: Matthew Williams hates his job, which includes working on a website for some company. Ivan Braginski also hates his job, which is fixing up the crap the desk workers seem to screw up. The dumb luck collision of a nerd and construction worker. Office AU
1. Chapter 1

Matthew Williams sighed for thousandth time that evening. Pushing his glasses onto the bridge of his nose, he took a sip of his fourth… fifth… he lost count.

Whatever, he took a sip of his coffee.

He leaned back in his chair, and looked at the screen before him. Endless amounts of HTML wracked his brain…all just numbers and codes.

A site he was working on and updating ever since he landed this job.

He set his coffee back down, and closed his eyes.

_This is what I went to University for? Really?_

He glared at the screen again, hoping the HTML would cringe under his stare.

_A god damn bachelors degree in Computer science. Thanks Waterloo, like, seriously, thanks a LOT._

His sarcastic thoughts were accompanied with an eye roll, as he let his fingers dance across the keyboard in a manner he was so used to. This was an everyday thing in the ever exciting life of Matthew Williams. The "Co-Manager of Internal and External CSS Capacity."

_What a fancy way to say "loser."_

The Canadian leaned onto the desk, and let his head rest in the palm of his hand.

"You're doing it again."

The sudden voiced snapped him out of his thoughts. He swiveled around to the familiar voice, and let out yet another, irritable sigh.

He was greeted by the sight of his boss. Great.

"Doing what?"

"Pretending to work when you are really not."

"But I am working."

"Just because you have the program open does not mean you are working, Matthew."

_Damn it! Alright, play it cool._

"Look at the screen, then…" He slid aside to give his superior enough room to lean over, and sure enough, the man accepted the invitation and set his gaze on the monitor to analyze it.

"Well then?" Matthew asked, almost smirking in satisfaction.

"Good work."

_I know._

"You have successfully moved the entire page slightly to the left."

"What?" his eyes widened a bit.

"See for yourself." The elder straightened and raised his cup of, what Matthew assumed to be tea, and took a sip. Matthew pressed the F2 key and opened up the web page. He refreshed it, only to see everything shift ten degrees at most to the left.

_Well shit._

Matthew's eye twitched a bit, and he bought his coffee up to his lips to take a tentative sip. However, he suddenly did not feel so thirsty anymore and set the coffee mug back down.

"Matthew."

Here it comes.

"Just because I am your friend does not mean you can lounge around here like it is some sort of playground."

"I know."

"And I cannot let slip ups like these happen too often!"

"I know."

"If I did, then what kind of company would this be? Certainly not a successful one."

"I know."

"We have a very large quota to fill in today and I expect it to be done."

"I know."

"Are you just doing that to agree with me?"

"Yeah."

"You know I hate that…"

Matthew smiled a bit. "I know."

His boss stared back at him, until he hunched over a bit to let out a chuckle. The laugher was contagious, and sure enough, Matthew seemed to giggle as well. It was nice to have his boss in a good mood, and even so, his friend was in a good mood too.

"Haha. So you know I'm docking your pay?"

Matthew's smile formed into a flat line, as he looked up to his boss for any signs of a bluff or a lie.

There was none.

"Seriously?"

"Yep."

"Oh."

Well, this is certainly unpleasant…

"Why!" Mathew yelled, in his mind anyway, in all actuality his voice was barely above that of an inside voice.

"Every department is going through a few minor budget cuts. "

Matthew shifted in his seat.

"How minor?"

"You know, two, three."

"… Two, three, what?"

"Thousand."

"Oh, that's not too bad…"

" A month."

That certainly caught the Canadian's attention. It was not as if his original pay was bad or anything, but anything less than what he was receiving would certainly cause some cutbacks in the future.

And that did not sit well with him.

He then realized he had two options:

A. Release the blind, seeping rage that was manifesting itself in him for years. In the form of a CSS manager, of course.

B. Pretend this is all a dream. A Fairly tale. Kindly smile at his boss and get back to work.

Matthew Williams used Canadian Fury.

"How the hell can you do this to us? I sit on my ass all day working on this stupid site for half the salary my brother has! Is this all for nothing?"

"Get over yourself, Matthew."

The attack was ineffective.

"You are not the only one facing this. The building is going through some… changes and I cannot just pull the money out of my arse. As I stated, you are not the only one."

Matthew would have pouted if he wasn't so professional.

"I don't see how that's fair."

"It isn't. Now get back to work." The man turned on his heel, in the direction of his own office.

"Is Alfred's salary getting cut?"

God, that is so terrible of me…

"Why?."

"Just asking."

"That is confidential."

"By how much?"

"Get back to work, Matthew."

"He's my brother, it's not like I would care!"

"Then why are you asking?"

"Because I'm just curious. He sits on his arse like I do; so it should be the same cut right?"

The elder bit his lip and let his gaze slip to the floor, but quickly restored his earlier composure and produced the most forced voice he could muster. This was definitely something Matthew did not miss.

"You know, two, three."

"Two. Three, what?"

"Maybe one."

"… What?"

"Alfred brings in a lot of money, you realize."

"… So he isn't losing anything?"

"No, he is definitely losing."

"Half of my god damn cut!"

"Calm down, Matthew. Like you said, you sit on your ass a lot. Something I cannot argue with." That last comment was accompanied by an incredulous look of disdain hurled towards the Canadian.

"But Alfred does the same thing too…"

"Yeah, but that's different."

"How the hell is it different?"

"He is in sales."

Matthew perked up an eyebrow. The elder, taking notice, answered the boys question before he even had a chance to ask.

"He charms the customer, tells them what they want to hear, makes a product that costs ten dollars appear as if it costs a million. These products don't sell themselves, you know."

Matthew stared at his boss, hate for many people and objects filling his gaze. Hate for this job, hate for HTML, and hate ((even a little jealousy)) for his brother. Even hate for the things that did not deserve it, like the coffee that had gone disgustingly flat or the broken copy machine that needed to be repaired months ago. Even Toris from accounting.

His superior stared back, unfazed; as the air around them grew awkward and heavy.

Matthew knew his boss was growing as frustrated as he was, as they both seemingly let out a sigh at the same time.

"Get back to work, Matthew."

And with that, Arthur Kirkland briskly walked away into his office.

* * *

_PIMPIN COMMENTARY.:_

_Er… so… I'm… writing… a story?_

_SURPRISE._

_Don't worry, I am totally still ILTW heavy. But, my amazing friend Niki-the-awesome and I decided to write an office AU story about Matt. We both love the movie office space, so figured why not. It would be totally fun! :D_

_Our writing name is "AwesomeSushi."_

_Tres interessant, non? But please enjoy this… and… yeah._

_AWESOME COMMENTARY:_

_I am so happy to be writing this with Sushi guys. She's pretty badass (as you can tell). This story was born through one late night of Skype talking and yah...hopefully you all think it is funny and junk. I'll be giving the university/Canada references while Sushi will be giving the website references and stuff. Yah. Hope you liked it. No hates bro. Peace out._

_~AwesomeSushi_


	2. Chapter 2

Matt's head was resting in the palm of his hand. His other hand was just resting on the mouse, clicking away at a serious game of solitaire.

His score was zero.

The time was 448948.

"Don't worry, all Solitaire games are rigged."

Matt noticed the typical bowl cut of dirty blonde hair peeking at him around his cubicle. If he didn't know the other, he would say a Russian accent; but _because _he knew the guy, he knew how much it pissed him off to have his gorgeous "Estonian" accent compared to that of a "dirty" Russian.

"You sure? I've played about eighty-four times."

"Indeed." The Estonian nodded.

"Then how come you always win?"

"Oh, I just know how to bypass the system."

Matthew blinked, uninterestedly.

"Shouldn't you be working on the site, Ed?"

"You mean the site that has looked the same since '03 and only has about six hits a day?"

"Yes."

"Yeah, no."

Matt rolled his eyes. He knew he was being particularly rude, but today was just not his day. Inside and out, he was completely grumpy to the point where he refused to be cheered up. His collared shirt was wrinkled, his tie hanging loose around his collar… he was not even wearing a belt.

"Come on, Matvey… What's the matter? You realize you can talk to me."

Matthew let his hand slide off of his face and let it rest on the arm of his chair.

May as well tell somebody.

"My salary was cut in half to fix up this… shitty building." Matt let his hand wave around at said adjective.

"Things keep breaking, and Arthur let the damage get so bad to the point where he has to take half the pay of everyone in this department."

Matt paused to look at Eduard. The elder was listening intently, but a smile on his face.

Whatever.

"Anyway, it's just angering. I was barely getting by…"

Still smiling.

"A-And my brother.. Alfred isn't… Why are you smiling?"

Eduard closed his eyes, the delight never leaving his face. He stood up, reached into his pants pocket and took out his wallet.

Oh God, no.

Not the wallet.

Matt covered his eyes.

"See this, Matvey?"

"You've shown it to me a thousand times!"

"Well, this is a thousand and one."

He scoffed, and separated two of his fingers to allow minimal vision.

The familiar picture of an adorable smile, bright blue eyes, and a mop of blonde hair came into focus.

It was Eduard's younger brother.

God Dammit, he was cute.

"This is Raivis."

"I know, Ed… look, I-"

" My parents adopted him when he was a child… he still looks like one even though he is sixteen now, he hates when I tease him about that, but I can't help it!" He paused to laugh a bit.

This was all too familiar.

So familiar, Matt mouthed the words as they left Eduard's mouth.

"Our whole family moved to America when he was ten, but my parents decided when he was twelve they wanted to move back to Estonia. Stop doing that"

He eyed Matt, and immediately, Matt's lips shut into a straight line.

"Raivis was so sad, he loved America so much. Other kids picked on him for his OCD back home, and he never really fit in that well."

"Uhm, you do know America has the highest homicide rate in the world, right?"

"When he heard we were moving back, he begged my parents to stay. Crying and sobbing for nights to come."

"Seriously, it's every man for himself over here."

"So I offered to take care of him myself… I dropped out of college, and landed a job here working with computers so I could keep putting him through high school"

"A complete bloodbath, man."

"And do you know why I am not bitter about these cuts?"

Matt sighed, mouthing the words once more as they left the Estonian's tongue.

"Because as long as I can see his smiling face, I will keep smiling with him. That in itself is worth much more than any amount of cash Mr. Kirkland would give me."

That day, a single Canadian tear was shed.

xx

Okay, maybe he was being a bit of a baby.

But he would still talk to his boss, seeing if he could sway his decision… maybe a little. He paced down the hallways.

_Hey Arthur, do you think that maybe you could only ruin a fourth of my life and take twenty five percent of my salary?_

He shook his head.

His hand was on the doorknob. And he let it linger there, too scared to open it.

Oh, wait a second… he was supposed to knock first. What if Arthur was busy? And even if he wasn't, Matthew hadn't the slightest idea of what he was going to say.

_You have to appeal to the masses, bro! _

He could hear his brothers' voice ringing in his head. His brother, one of the main sources of his unrequited anger… and of course, Toris from accounting.

_Tell them what they want to hear. They'll be eating out of the palm of your hand.._

Wow, that voice sounded really close.

"You can do it, Matt. I believe in you!"

Matthew stared at the American in front of him, haughtily. His predictable million dollar smile practically glued on his face. He eyed him up and down, his usual work attire: A white collared shirt, tanned pants and a bomber jacket decorating his figure.

"Al, what are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be working?"

"Oh, I am! Some guy from Cuba has some sort of ice cream fetish. I thought maybe if I bought him some, he'd be more interested in buying a stock!"

"Uh huh..."

"And I need to borrow five bucks from Artie to do that."

"Oh..." He refused to roll his eyes.

"Say, you need to talk to Arthur, too?"

"Uhm... well, I was... but it's fine."

"Naw, come on, we'll go in together!"

"Alfred, I don't think that's-"

Matt never stood a chance against his brothers' brute stregnth as they barged in there like its nobody's business.

Even though Alfred did most of the barging.

"What do you blokes want? Haven't you ever heard of a daw' knob!" Arthur was in the middle of hanging up the phone before he looked up at the two 'blokes' in question.

"Hah, Artie, why do you saw 'daw'? It's 'door'"

"Piss off, wanka'..."

"There's an 'e' and an 'r' at the end of that.. just throwin' that out there."

"There's also an 'e' and an 'r' in 'fired'. So tell me what you want before I put my words into action!"

_Damn, Arthur don't play no shit._

Alfred grinned cheekily as he shrugged, ignoring the earlier threat and slinging an arm around his temporarily forgotten brother.

"My bro's got somethin' he wants to say!"

"Very well then" Arthur nodded as he signed off some papers, not even eyeing the Canadian.

"... uh..." Matt tried to find inspiration in his meek voice, all his earlier rage dissipating and merely forming into the quirky pursing of his lips, shuffling his feet a bit.

"If you haven't anything to say, then there's the 'daw'"

"DOOR!"

"You can take the 'daw' too!" Arthur pointed at it, even though Matt was standing in front of it.

"No, Artie, this is a 'Matthew'" Alfred shook him. "But THAT is a DOOR."

"I know what the bloke's name is!"

"Uh... guys..."

"And that's another thing, what the hell is a'bloke'? It sounds like a disfiguring disease."

"I'll disfigure you if you don't sod off, wanka'!"

"Uhm, excuse me, I just..."

"Hah, you Brits, man.. no sense of humor!"

"I'm sorry my sense of humah' doesn't involve racist jokes and making fun of fat people!"

Alfred gasped.

"That is NOT all we Americans laugh at!"

"Seriously, you guys aren't even talking about the same thing..."

"Then what makes you laugh, hm!"

"Can I borrow your five dollars?"

"I beg your pardon!"

"Will you two just stop!"

The Brit and the American both blinked aimlessly and peered over to the huffing Canadian.

"What are you two even arguing about? It has /nothing/ to do with the most important matter at hand here!"

"Geez, Matt... what's got your panties in a twist?"

"Yeah, what's got your knickers in a bunch?"

"... Really, Artie? Really?"

"You!" Matt pointed at the American.

"And YOU!" Then at his boss.

"And THIS!" He flailed his arms a bit to emphasize the entire building.

A mop of chocolate brown hair shyly peeked into the room.

"I brought you coffee, sir.."

"SHUT UP, TORIS."

"..."

The Lithuanian slinked back to his accounting desk.

"Arthur, I can't allow you to cut my salary..."

The Britishman huffed and rolled his eyes, bringing a hand up to rub his temples as he eyed the Canadian with exhaustion.

"It's too late, Matthew, I already made a down payment on construction." The Britishman sat back in his chair, allowing it to loll around brisky as he crossed his legs at the ankle.

"Why don't we move into a new building since this one keeps... breaking."

"It's not easy to just pick up this business and put it somewhere else, besides, this is much moh' economic."

Matt quirked an eyebrow as his brother began speaking.

"Yeah, Matt!" The energetic American hopped up on the desk and swung his legs like a child, despite the look of contempt Arthur shot him for sitting on some important papers.

"The guys we found do it for really cheap for barely any pay, you'll barely tell the difference between your checks and in a few weeks, this place will be as good as new!"

_Well, if that didn't sound sketchy..._

"Can't you just... cancel it?"

"Ah.. No, I cannot." Arthur rested his head in the palm of his hand.

"Why?" Matt questioned..

"Because I just got off the phone with them, they're going to be here tomorrow."

"...Oh..."

Well, the first thing they would have to fix was the the numerous amounts of dents in the walls from where Matt smashed his head in.

_PIMPIN COMMENTARY:_

_I was here the whole time, I swear. DD: _

_Seriously, thats all we Americans laugh at.. well, I do anyway, I shamelessly laugh at racist jo-Oh, who are you kidding, you like Hetalia. = n =_

This chapter is pretty derpy, and has been sitting in my memory for like.. a GOOOOD while, man. Until today, on this day, I was like... this is it. 

_-types away like a maniac-_

_YEAAAAAAHHH._

_I hope you sort of enjoyed it, Ivan will appear next chap, I promise!_

_Many hugs, kisses and yaoi~! :D_

xx

_AWESOME COMMENTARY:_

_I love America, he's my guilty pleasure. I think it's because he reminds me of myself. We're both spazes and get side tracked easily. And then there is Matt... Pfft xD._


End file.
